You and your caring self are such an inspiration to me.
--
I felt myself practically skipping the remaining distance separating us.
I felt myself smiling like a fool, with a heart so big and brimming with love and yearning.
I felt myself as if I wasn't almost x years old; my demeanor, my excitement, were all reminiscent of younger, loving times.
I felt so much, I almost forgot that my feelings were not that way anymore. Weren't supposed to be that way.
But when I finally saw you, my heart decided that my reason didn't need to take over my actions.
And every feeling, grand or small, got out of my system in the way of hugs, compliments..
--
I felt trapped in a place I didn't want to be, with someone who obssesed over having me by their side forever.
They told me they couldn't stand my feelings for you. Why I resisted so much to "something so simple" in their minds; stop wanting to talk to you about my life, my passions, my feelings, my thoughts.
As if it was easy, to stop wanting to share experiences with someone so very dear to me.
Their jealousy drived me insane to the point of no return. I have to thank them tho; my ideas of forever and mine in my mind totally collapsed thanks to their jealousy. To this day, I don't believe in those words anymore, no matter the relationship I have.
--
You said something among the lines of "we are always connected, one way or another", and I couldn't contain my happiness in that instant. Even if I didn't show it, I gleamed internally.
Because it is true, we always were, are, will be. I feel that our connection is so special and tender, like the ones that come out of the most complicated of adventure books.
I never felt more at ease with someone, more understood. Imagine how sad those times were without you near me, always the supporter, the hug giver. It was torture, to be so far away from you.
--
I wish I could give you more than these sentimental words, but please consider them as dearly as they are to me anyways. I have so many drabbles based on our last chat only; you know how emotional I am, specially with certain aspects of our bond.
I have no idea how you would react to this, but I'm hoping that you don't freak out that much. You can be quite the exaasperated when feelings are involved, even if ours were stated since a really long time ago.
It could be fun, no? to be able to talk about feelings without it being a bother. I believe it could cure so many broken souls from this cold cold world. Imagine for a minute with me, and tell me if i'm in the wrong.
--
Thank you for your patience, for your kindness, for your selfishlessness.
Thank you for always being there for me, even if we were miles and words apart. Worlds apart.
Thank you for never giving up on me, on my ways, even with my internal struggles with freedom.
Thank you for being you, always.