I've been an observer since I was very little, from a safe distance. Not only because I avoid getting my feelings hurt, but also because I can see from my direction all of the details of any scene without being a part of it. Call me a coward, but when I adore something so much I want to avoid changing it. It's so special, their way, themselves only.
I'm very proud of this gift I have, but at the same time not. I do not enjoy being an observer all off the time, because I know taking action in some stuff can lead to fun adventures and happy endings, but I think that part of me as selfish and greedy. I'm not the kind of person who always puts themselves and their preferences first, their feelings first. I prefer to simply let things be the way they have to, without interfiering, without my say in the matter.
Specially with specific people, whom I adore.
I call this custom of mine stargazing.. because that's what they are, stars in my life, filling out my space with their presence and their brigthness. They are afraid to shine in a crowd, but when their facade slips when they don't think I'm noticing them it's amazing. At that moment my heart swells up with pride, joy and love for them and their bravery for showing their true selves, complete with their sparkling eyes when they talk about something they love, their beautiful smile, the softness that drips from their soft and loving gestures.
Even if they seem unreachable to me, they are just a hug away. Even if they hide or shy away, I will always keep an eye, just in case, always by their orbit if they need my tender words. Even if they don't feel like stars and laugh at my loving and sappy discourse, they will always have me anyways. That's what my soul wants, to be their spectator, their quiet audience that cheers when they laugh and sorrows when they cry.
So yeah.. stargazing. My favourite thing in the world.